S1 E.15 Adriana’s Bullying Story
In this EpisodeIn this episode, Mariah listens as Adriana goes into detail about her bullying story, and how these negative experiences grew into a positive purpose: Little Words Project!
To start, Adriana and Mariah give a short life update. For Mariah, her dating life still remains the same, she is enjoying time with her dad, and she has watched Hamilton 4 times. Let’s be real, at this point, she should be IN the show. Angelica, Peggy, and Mariah, am I right?!
For Adriana, she is still not pregnant, but is hopeful. She shares that she had a really good retrieval round and a lot more embryos. (YAY!) From now on, she will not share when transfers are done out of caution, but in the meantime, send Adriana some love and baby dust!
Now, we dive deep into Adriana’s bullying story. This story starts in elementary school. At this time, Adriana’s nose was the primary subject. It started out as a typical bullying scenario – kids being kids. The girls note that in most instances, kids do not realize that what they are doing is unacceptable until much later on. As unfortunate as this elementary school circumstance was, the story continues to escalate. This is just the beginning.
Then, 5th grade rolls around. As if 5th grade couldn’t be more awkward, Adriana moved to a new town with her family. She notes that she came from a much different socioeconomic background than her peers. In her school, it seemed that everyone talked the same, dressed the same, looked the same, and all of the moms were best friends. Though she built a friend group at school, Adriana recalls that there were still times that she was ostracized and constantly felt as if she was less than everyone else. One of the most memorable moments from that year is gym class: whenever Adriana and her peers would play a game of dodgeball, she was always the target.
Adriana got through 5th grade (thank goodness), but there’s more. She touches on a circumstance in the lunch line where a peer told her “aliens belong in the back of the line.” Adriana says that she remembers every detail of this: the peer’s name, the location, and the exact moment. She and Mariah talk about how these moments are very defining – you simply don’t forget them. This time of your life is extremely developmental, and when these moments take place, it feels like the world is ending.
This leads to our next facet of the story. Adriana and Mariah talk about not always being innocent, regardless of being considered the “victim” in these situations. Mariah mentions a specific instance of her own with a close friend named Aaron. Aaron was open with Mariah and told her that she was the first person that he ever considered a bully. Of course, this prompted Mariah to look back and question her actions. In 6th grade, your humor and morals are not totally developed. You just tend to say things, not knowing the effect they can have on people.
Adriana also looks back on times that she could have been a bully to someone unknowingly. From her own experience, she has a mental list of everyone that bullied her over the years – and it made her realize that she could be on someone else’s “list.” It is NEVER too late to apologize for something you’ve said or done - in fact, it is so important.
Middle school continued, and before Adriana knew it, she was an 8th grader. She became close with 2 girls – for privacy reasons, we are calling them Alex and Sandy. Alex and Sandy had been best friends for years, and then Adriana became closer to Alex. Sandy felt left out, and this prompted her to tell her older sister – who mind you, was a “popular” junior in high school with a cool boyfriend – about the situation. This is the beginning of Adriana’s chapter where life was a LIVING HELL.
The summer before freshman year, Sandy attended high school parties and would prank call Adriana. The phone would be passed around and everyone would tell Adriana how ugly she was and threaten to kill her if she ever talked to Sandy again. Adriana was already navigating the fear of going to high school, so this only added to that.
That same summer, Adriana and her family took a family vacation to Mexico. She left her phone at home – life was so different then. Just as she arrived home after the vacation, she saw 57 unknown missed calls. Adriana’s friend George then called her, and explained that someone changed her answering machine message to something foul, and everyone was calling her to listen to it. Turns out, this special someone was Sandy’s older sister’s “cool” boyfriend. Adriana told her dad, and obviously, it was uncomfortable to say the least. The phone company and the police got involved, but there was no immediate resolution. In the meantime, Adriana still had to continue on and navigate her current reality, which was starting high school in less than 2 weeks.
Another group decided to join in on the fun, creating a fake AIM screen name very similar to Adriana’s real one, claiming to be her. Foul messages were being sent to seniors, and this molded a reputation of her, before she even entered the high school building. Again, Adriana had no idea that this was happening, until someone named Charles messaged her on her real account, claiming they had just talked last week. She figured out the situation, and Charles was kind throughout the whole process (shoutout to you, Charles!)
When Adriana finally started high school, people were mean without even knowing her face. They would give her the finger through classroom doors, and threaten to kill her, once again. Needless to say, Adriana had to block this out to the best of her ability, but it was hard.
Adriana then notes that one of the most notable nights in this entire story takes place at a football game on 10/8/04. When peers found out that she was there, they surrounded her, and began saying horrible things about her family and yelling racist remarks. Holding in her tears, Adriana broke out of the situation, called her dad, and once she was in the car, she started hysterically crying.
This was the last straw. Throughout this whole process, Adriana did not want anyone to get involved. Her parents luckily supported this, but it got to a point where they all needed support. This was considered a hate crime, and everyone suddenly began to pay attention.
As high school continued, Adriana became hardened. These experiences molded her and she did not put up with any nonsense anymore. High school was finally over, and it felt like a breath of fresh air…
…until college rolls around. Adriana was hopeful that she could use this as a completely fresh start, but that unfortunately did not happen. She joined Delta Zeta, and for reference, this chapter got a really bad rap and had lots of trouble finding recruits. She was unsure about this, and her dad told her some advice that changed her perspective: “If it isn’t what you love, change it.”
Joining the sorority and sticking with it led her to become the VP of Recruits, and she was passionate about instituting positive practices into the sorority. The chapter started with 12 girls who didn’t really want to be there, and with Adriana’s help, there were 36 girls who genuinely wanted to be there just one year later. Of course, other chapters accused her of hiring professionals and paying girls to join. Pure competitive cruelty, if you ask us.
Adriana then became the subject on a platform called CollegeACB. It was the same type of comments as high school. Throughout her years at college, there was really nobody who made her feel supported, until Bill came along. No matter what, he was there for her and made her feel beautiful (and, if you are new here, they are still together to this day!)
An epiphany moment came to Adriana – she began making bracelets for herself with positive words on them, so she could look down at all times and remind herself of her worth. Eventually, she began making these bracelets for her sorority, and they became the most iconic symbol of sisterhood.
While these bullies ended up fueling Adriana into creating the Little Words Project we know and love today, we need to recognize that this is not the case for everyone - especially those without a solid support system. That’s why we need to be kind, remind others (and yourself!) how loved they are, and surround yourself with people who do the same.
Listen to the full episode for more, and we’ll catch you next week!
Important Times0:48 - Welcome back!
2:49 - Life update
8:27 - Bullying story begins
15:57 - Mariah’s friend Aaron
17:51 - Adriana – reaching out to anyone she could have been a bully to
18:52 - 8th grade/high school
22:04 - Adriana’s family vacation to Mexico
27:10 - AIM screen name
28:19 - Start of high school
29:14 - 10/8/04 football game
32:54 - Phone numbers come back
35:16 - College
38:38 - Cyberbullying at college
40:41 - Bill
41:57 - LWP
45:07 - Fueled by bullies
47:54 - Biggest fear as a mom
55:43 - Inspirational advice from Adriana
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Welcome bestie.
We’re so glad you’re here.
We’re Adriana and Mariah. Co-hosts, entrepreneurs, BFFs, and girls just like you trying to figure it out as we go.
