S1 E.8 Bill & Adriana: How it Started
In this EpisodeOn this episode, we dove into the story behind Bill and Adriana’s relationship from the beginning. Even though it seems like they have the perfect relationship (and let’s be honest - they kind of do!) things weren’t always easy, especially in the early years of their story. We hope that this story can serve as hope for some girls (or guys) out there who may be struggling to keep a relationship alive, but who really do believe that this is their person. Keep reading to find out how Bill and Adriana’s story unfolded.
Let’s take it back to the college years – Adriana and Bill lived in the same dorm building during their freshman year, where they met in the first week of school. First impressions - Adriana thought Bill was a tall, cute white kid, and Bill was immediately intrigued by Adriana. At this point, Adriana had been in about a 3 year relationship with someone else, so she never saw Bill as someone she’d be interested in romantically. She even set him up with some of her own girlfriends before they ever got together! But, even though they didn’t get involved romantically until later in their college careers, they were always best friends, and referred to each other as that.
When sophomore year rolled around, Adriana realized that she could in fact see herself dating Bill. She even remembers the moment that she came to this realization - they were in the car with two of their other friends, and she had to sit on Bill’s lap because there weren’t enough seats. As much as Adriana tried to deny her feelings (for a little while), they obviously eventually ended up dating.
Bill likes to say that he slow-played their relationship to perfection – there was no “Adriana came around” to liking him – he likes to think that he was the mastermind behind her finally realizing that she had feelings for him and wanted to date him (:eye roll:).
Alright, so let’s fast forward a bit. Adriana and Bill had officially gotten together as boyfriend and girlfriend in May of their sophomore year. It took them so long to get together from the time that Adriana started entertaining the idea of them being together because during their “talking” stage - or whatever you want to call it - Bill was… how do we put this nicely? He was a college guy – sometimes Adriana would leave a party and she’d find out that after she left Bill was talking to another girl, or they’d get in a fight, and Adriana would hear that another girl came over to Bill’s after their argument. But, let’s be clear – Bill never cheated on Adriana, and let’s cut him some slack, too – he was a 19 year old college kid. What else did we expect?
So, they started dating, and it was good for about 2 years, up until their senior year. Adriana called herself out and admitted that she was probably a little bit hard to date, and that’s what led to the first breakup (GASP! Yes, they broke up… and more than once!). Because Adriana felt that she knew that she had met her literal husband in Bill, she expected a lot from him and wanted the relationship to go a certain way, which maybe wasn’t what Bill had expected. Their relationship at this stage had gotten to a point where it felt like they were married; always together, always asking and needing to know what the other person was up to. So, naturally - 8 months out from graduation - Bill got nervous. What happens after this? Do we get engaged? Move in together? What is my life supposed to look like?
And so, Bill broke up with her (at an Avicii concert… during the concert) In his words, guys aren’t thinking about 20 or 30 years down the road. They’re honestly thinking about the next week ahead of them. So while Adriana may have felt that Bill was it for her, it’s not to say that he didn’t think the same way, but it shows that guys just sometimes aren’t as future-minded as women. In the couple of days that followed, both of them entertained the idea of what life would be like without the other person, and ended up getting back together. They dated through the rest of college, and upon graduating, Bill had taken a job working for Johnson & Johnson, and Adriana had landed an internship working for a PR firm in Manhattan.
But, it wasn’t smooth sailing from the end of college. Bill had a 2 week orientation to attend for his new job, and Adriana started to get anxious. She even remembers asking him one night, “What happens if you go, you meet another girl, and we break up?” He told her that he wasn’t going anywhere, but little did they both know… he did go somewhere, and that somewhere was right to another girl he had met at orientation. Bill and Adriana broke up yet again, and what followed were the worst months of both of their lives, but also some great lessons, especially for anyone going through similar situations.
There were two takeaways from this situation – one from Bill’s perspective, and one from Adriana’s. Bill learned throughout this time that guys don’t fall in love as easily as women do, and in order for them to realize what they have in front of them, there might need to be points of relativity in other relationships, or experiences to compare to. Women are usually smart enough to know that a lifelong partner doesn’t need to check all the boxes to be the perfect match for you, but in Bill’s eyes, when men are younger, they do think that women need to check every single one of their boxes. It’s only upon having time apart and seeing what’s behind door number 2 that they see what they had before. It took Bill trying to date other people to see that what he had with Adriana was special.
For Adriana, she learned the importance of being indifferent during a breakup. Never let the other person know how bad they hurt you – don’t post sad songs or quotes on your Instagram stories, don’t let them know that you were looking at their Facebook page for an hour, don’t let anyone tell them that you’re upset, none of that. As far as they know, you are indifferent to the breakup, and you are living your best life. Let them wonder about you, because it makes them think of you, and you dodge a bullet either way – they either are thinking of you, so they come back, realizing what they lost, OR, they don’t reach out at all and then you know that they weren’t the one anyway.
Anyways, back to the story. Bill kept reaching out to Adriana even while he was with the other girl, but she played it cool – remember, indifference is key! Bill was always the one to reach out. He ended up breaking up with the girl from work after about 3 months, and Bill and Adriana had talked a little more about what their relationship would look like moving forward. Adriana knew that they needed more time apart, so they didn’t get back together. She went on a backpacking trip in Australia with her best friend, and by the time she got back, Bill had fully realized that he messed up.
So, they met up yet again during the holidays and Adriana told him that if this was something that he was serious about, he’d have to be ready to win back her entire family. It wouldn’t be easy, she warned him, but he said that he was ready and wanted to do it. For 4 months, Bill would drive 2 hours from his house to hers just to take her out to dinner, and then drive straight home the same night. And, we guess you could say that they lived happily ever after.
We hope that Bill and Adriana’s love story is able to show you that even though it might not be a perfect relationship at the moment, that doesn’t mean that it won’t work out. The right situation is worth fighting for – if you truly believe that this person could be your forever, then it’s worth going through the ups and downs. Talk to you next week!
Important Times0:44 - Hello from Adriana!
2:59 - Welcome Bill!
6:37 - The start of the story
11:58 - When it clicked for Adriana that she liked him
15:10 - A note from Adriana
18:37 - The male mindset in college
19:52 - The official start of dating & the breakup
25:15 - Another note from Adriana & Bill’s mindset behind the second breakup
33:47 - Last note from Adriana
38:47 - Adriana’s Australia trip
46:05 - To the girls thinking that he will come back
49:50 - Advice for the occasional guy who listens
55:23 - Secret to a successful marriage
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Welcome bestie.
We’re so glad you’re here.
We’re Adriana and Mariah. Co-hosts, entrepreneurs, BFFs, and girls just like you trying to figure it out as we go.
