S1 E.4 Adriana’s Fertility Journey
In this EpisodeIn this episode, Adriana delves deep into something that she has had to glow through in her own personal life. We’ve joked a lot about Adriana’s infertility in some previous episodes - and while we do think it’s important to laugh at ourselves to get through the difficult times, it’s also just as important to talk about the situations that we face, and hopefully sharing will be able to help someone else out there listening.
Adriana and Bill got married in 2017, and in September of 2018, they decided that they wanted to start trying to conceive. Having always wanted to be a mother, Adriana was excited to start the process, even though growing up, she’d always had a feeling that getting pregnant was going to be difficult for her. She and Bill had always viewed parenthood as such a sacred thing, and something that they would be so lucky to experience, that she was afraid of it not happening for her.
After the first 6 months, the nagging feeling that had always been in the back of Adriana’s head started to get stronger, and another nagging feeling started to set in – Adriana wanted to know more about other people’s stories. Not many people were sharing how long it had taken them to get pregnant; rather, we’d just see the people who were getting pregnant, and be left with the mystery of how and why it was so “easy”' for them, but not for her.
Two more months went by, and Adriana went for a doctor’s visit and asked for a fertility test. Through the series of tests that she took, everything came back normal, and she was told to keep trying for four more months. Only after the full year of trying should she visit a fertility doctor.
Lo and behold, one year rolled around, and Bill and Adriana visited a fertility doctor in New York City. The results were disheartening, to say the least – Adriana had a low AMH number. AMH is the hormone that helps give insight to doctors as to what your egg reserve looks like, and it varies per person. She also showed a low follicle count. After receiving the results, though upsetting, Adriana didn’t think much of it. She instead decided to focus her energy on working on her lifestyle, and hoping that would result in better test results down the line. And so, this brings us to the day before Adriana’s 30th birthday.
6 months after her first test with the low results, Adriana went in to get the same test again, one day before her 30th birthday. The results of this test would determine if her lifestyle changes had made any difference in being able to conceive naturally or through fertility treatments. The good news – Adriana’s numbers doubled, which put her into the category of unexplained infertility. The bad news – though her numbers had spiked, after 19 months of trying to get pregnant, the pregnancy test results were still negative. At this point in the podcast’s timeline (and if you’ve been following us since 2020, you know the good news ;)), Bill and Adriana have decided to skip right to IVF treatments.
So, what are we trying to say beyond telling you about Adriana’s fertility journey? There’s a couple things:
For starters, life can suck sometimes. But that’s the beauty of glowing through some things. We can’t glow through the positives in life, because they’re already good. We don’t necessarily need to find the deeper meaning in what goes right for us, but when we hit these roadblocks, we are able to glow through them, learn from them, and become stronger because of them. This journey does not make Adriana feel like any less of a woman, but unfortunately there is a culture of shame around infertility (despite how common it is) that does make a lot of women feel less than, and there shouldn’t be. Infertility happens to 1 in 8 couples, and its taboo nature needs to be combatted through sharing our stories.
Second, Adriana’s story of hope and strength can show us that our struggles do not define us. Yes, this is a part of her story (and it might be a really long chapter in her story), but it’s not who she is. It just goes to show even more so that when we believe we can have something, we can reach that goal through the struggle, and through the strength it takes to get there.
Third, Adriana’s story shows us that it’s okay not to be okay. Everything is relative, and we will all want something that we can’t have at a particular moment in time. And yes, while we can feel blessed for the other things in our lives that are going the way that we want them to, it’s just as important to mourn the losses of the things that we can’t have in that moment. And when people tell us to relax and we get annoyed - because how are you supposed to relax when the one thing you want the most is out of reach - we sometimes just have to let go. We have to let go of control, and leave it to the hands of whatever you believe in – God, the universe, or whatever else it may be.
Finally, we have to rely on the communities around us to get us through. Adriana shares her fertility journey as a way to cope with her struggles, but also as a way to reach out to the people like her, going through this journey, who might need to see someone who is going through the same thing, or to have someone to show them that things will work out in the end (We’re looking at you, Ford!).
Important Times0:45 - Welcome back to the podcast
1:20 - Laughing through the tough times
4:24 - Change in Adriana and Bill and how they live their day-to-day since Mariah met them
6:49 - A note from Adriana & the start of her fertility journey
13:13 - After the first 6 months
14:41 - Another note from Adriana
16:10 - After the second test
18:55 - Another note from present-day Adriana
20:07 - Feelings throughout this whole process
25:37 - Adriana’s support system
29:08 - Welcome Halle Tecco
35:26 - When did Halle know she couldn’t try naturally anymore
38:10 - Why did Halle keep trying and stay strong
44:50 - A little bit about Natalist
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Welcome bestie.
We’re so glad you’re here.
We’re Adriana and Mariah. Co-hosts, entrepreneurs, BFFs, and girls just like you trying to figure it out as we go.
